The right steps or the wrong ones lol?
The right ones were just following this guide from lululvlv. Very quick and took all of 20 minutes to do with no additional hardware outside the uConsole.
The wrong steps were (the following is not useful or particularly helpful information aside from a cautionary tale about not being the kind of fool who doesn’t read the information that was readily available to them, like me) 1. using a 10 years old hp laptop.(don’t judge me, I only keep this thing around to use 2018 Photoshop, i hate Microsoft, Adobe, and HP but I refuse to use GIMP) 2. spending a half hour moving 70 gigs of nonessential files off the sd card because I was tired and forgot that wouldn’t actually speed up the cloning. 3. writing the .img file onto the drive i was supposed to be cloning. 4. realizing I accidentally did that. 5. finding a new drive to clone the 100 gig file onto. 6. realizing none of my other drives had enough space. 7. spending another hour transferring 70 gigs of files from one drive to another to make enough space to transfer the 100 gig img file. 8. spending an hour transfering the 100 gig image to another drive. 9. writing the drive. 10. realize the drive doesn’t boot 
11. go to sleep becacuse its 6 am. 12. wake up, go to the clockwork pi forum, read lululvlv’s guide and just do that instead.